The days are going by so fast. Summer is in full swing, all heat spikes and thundershowers. I try to notice. I do well at a slow pace generally, even if I am sometimes restless. The thing is, I don't quite know what I'm doing in life, especially since the camera has added a new dimension. I am used to computer and journal and whatever book I'm reading at the time. And that's it. An occasional trip out to get nachos or sushi for special. I have grown used to the simplicity of that and I really appreciate it after all the rough and tumble of schizophrenia. But I mulled it over for a few days, what to do with my wonky camera-printer system and I decided that I would try a used Apple laptop, one with a disk drive so I can install both camera and printer on the same system. I found one for $299. So my ultra on sale camera package is a bit of a money pit after all, but I'm still getting a good price on everything. I have missed Apple anyway. It will be nice - and luxurious - to have one again. I know they wear well and I decided this was better than buying a new one with an external drive - cheaper and more to my taste anyway. I'm kind of old school by nature. I don't like having to say goodbye to shelf stereos and all that. In any case, I will be able to print and that is important - the enormous printer is just sitting on my table under wraps just waiting for something to happen. For my next project, I want to uncover the mystery of shooting in black and white so I can take pictures of my parents' hands. I took a picture of my mom's hands in black and white about ten years ago now, and I loved how it came out. I had it enlarged and framed for her birthday. But then I had an episode and I took it off the wall and broke it. I had lost the negative early on in a similar way. My whole life is in the city dump now. I will try again though and hopefully I can resist the urge to purge from now on.
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June 2017
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