Brandt Lane June 2016. I have had a very hard time. My clocks have been tampered with and people are trying to throw me off my schedule generally. It's all so bizarre that I can't really clarify what happened. Every time I get a headspace I can live with, a pace, a way of thinking, i'm hijacked. It's horrible. And as I said in my last post, every no I ever gave has been overridden. I'm trying to keep the faith. It's just all so ridiculous I say, but I know it's worse than that. I have just laid out again and again the rules and I can't seem to clear a path. I don't understand. I mean, I'm schizophrenic, on Disability, trying to keep to a budget, I have a routine, I have been thrown off schedule and I'm very worried about my friend V, who is just trying to keep going as usual, I wasn't sure about her, she's tired which is a good thing, but I was worried about her anyway. Don't quite know.
I'm hoping to paint this afternoon. I'm feeling ok about that. Brandt Lane 2016. I'm having a hard time doing what I want. All my no's were ignored. I can't get over it. I just keep trying to do what I do. I try to write here when I can. It's nice for me to do that, so I'm upset that my stream of consciousness was ruined. That's not how I like to write here. Maybe I will be able to write more later.
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June 2017
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